A bad movie, and no amount of wishing is going to make it otherwise. It's incredibly frustrating, because you can see so clearly what Kevin Smith wanted to do - make a homage to 80s buddy cop films. But it fails for two main reasons, neither of them Smith's.
Firstly, the script is wrong - the buddy films worked because they were firstly dramatic/action stories, with comedy added (eg Lethal Weapon, Running Scared, 48 Hours) - this is just a silly story with a bit of action. It lacks a decent villain, climax, ideas, etc (although I did enjoy Sean William Scott's thief).
Secondly, Bruce Willis looks bored and disinterested through the whole film - he has zero chemistry with Tracy Morgan (who doesn't quite get his character right either, but at least seems to be trying). He also plays an unlikeable character - he clearly was a dud dad, why should we care if he pays for the wedding or not?
Watching this, I kept wishing the budget had been ten times smaller with a Smith script and Smith leads (supporting actors Sean William Scott, Adam Brody and Jason Lee all would have been better) - or twice as larger so at least that way there would have been some decent stunts.