The first Benton script I’ve read (I have seen a bunch of his moves though). It’s intelligent, thoughtful work – a very good screenplay. Reading this apart from the film means you’re not as distracted by the politics, star power and brown suits. It’s Ted’s journey from selfish man and lousy husband and father to a much nicer person.
So much of it feels true – Ted blithely apologising when his wife announces she’s going to leave (thinking that’ll fix it), his insistence that all is okay (the French toast scene is a great example of subtext in screenwriting), his denial that he was a bad husband (“I remembered every anniversary”), his work boss who now has lost a friend because Ted can’t hang with him as often, his friendship with their neighbour (has their been a better depiction of a platonic friendship between a man and a woman in a Hollywood film?)
Some interesting things which I don’t believe made the final cut – Ted talks to a “Saturday dad” who resents the time he has to spend with his child; Phyllis, his casual root in the film, has an extra scene where she plays some baseball with Billy and Ted and then a moment where she tells Ted she’s moving to do a job in another city (the big print indicates they love each other, which to be honest I never got). The script has scope for improvisation in a few scenes – it says things like “Billy and Ted are walking along talking about cartoons”. Joanna’s depression was more evident in the film – the amount of time she was away from her child is less emphasised here. And the script ends with a final shot of Billy and Ted amongst all the other families in the part. An excellent, moving script.
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