The opening sets this up very well - a junky adventure story set in late 30s Shanghai. Great. Missing jewels. Chinese. Japanese. Opium. Love it.
I get what they're going for - African Queen type stuff. She's a missionary - he's a con man. Sparks fly. But Madonna never gives off missionary vibes. The script doesn't help her - she smokes, takes nude baths, seduces Sean Penn. Penn looks scungy and has no history. He's a great actor but he needs to be tormented.
You know what might've worked? Swapping the roles. Have her has a shady dame and he's a priest. Then she could have sung. She doesn't even sing.
The plot is simple but also confusing. Action scenes unmemorable. Not very well directed. I know it would've been hard.
Lovely production design. Richard Griffiths fun. Some Asian actors in it.