Movie review - "It's a Bikini World" (1967) ** (re-watching)

 One of the last of the beach party cycle - shot in 1965 it wasn't released until 1967. It benefits from star power - Tommy Kirk and Deborah Walley are given a lot more to do than in The Ghost in the Invisible Bikini.

The film is a fairly shameless rip off of Beach Party  - Bob Pickett wears his hat like Jody McCrea's Deadhead, Sig Haig's Big Daddy is like Morey Amsterdam.

Yet all through are attempts to make a good movie - the opening credits using live footage and cartoons plus a great guitar riff, whoever signed the artists (The Toys, The Animals).

My view of this hasn't changed. Nice stars, Breezy tone. Not enough story. Feels padded, with scenes of people walking around, and sports contest. Very likeable cast.

Movie review - "Sextette" (1978) **

 It's weird to watch. So weird. But how else to have done it? No one else could've played Mae West and Mae West was 85.

So they shove it full of songs and stars and shenanigans. It's silly but it has a compulsive fascinating. Tim Dalton completely commits, whether ogling Mae or singing "Love will Keep Us Together". George Hamilton also tries but isn't entirely convincing as a gangster. Neither is Ringo Starr as a European director, but it's fun to see him. Ditto Tony Curtis as a Russian, Dom De Luise as a manager flunky type. She has a chat with George Raft in an elevator.

It's odd. So odd. So camp. Jeez, Ken Hughes made some crap in the 70s.  Keith Moon is in it - he would be dead soon. Van McCoy pops up. And Alice Cooper. AND Walter Pidgeon.

It's got to be said some of the lines are funny. And the film does want to entertain. It's grotesque. 

There seems to be little cult for it - Myra Breckenridge is better known.

Movie review - "Hell on Wheels" (1967) *

Part of the stock car film boom of the late 60s - were any of these films genuinely popular? It didn't last very long - there never seemed to be break out hits like biker movies.

This one has a second lead John Ashley who was in AIP movies - this isn't AIP it's Crown International i.e. independently financed and released by them. The star is some singer, Marty Robbins who I wasn't that familiar with. He sings a lot of his songs. Actually so do these other actrs.

It's a cheap looking movie - lots of stock footage, and close ups. Cramped scenes in living rooms. Even the songs are tightly shot.anic

The central dramatic situation isn't bad - Ashley and Robins are brothers, Ashley is a mechanic and jealous of driver Robbins and there's a third brother who is an agent investigating moonshining.

But Ashley's jealousy is mainly manifested via whingeing. Ashley's girlfriend whinges too. Ashley gives the one professional performance. The actors playing agents  are so awkward I assume they're real moonshiners. I love the anti moonshining ads they have. The moonshining plot sounds promising but it dealt with very quickly - I mean Ashley and his brother are kidnapped and escape in the blink of an eye but there are endless scenes of musical act.

Movie review – “It’s a Bikini World” (1967) **

One of the last beach party movies has several points of interest – the first directed by a woman (Stephanie Rothman), appearances from the Animals (singing ‘We’ve Got to Get Out of this Place’) and the Castaways, a cast including Tommy Kirk, Deborah Walley, Bobby "Monster Mash" Pickett and Sid Haig.

Kirk normally played boys next doors and/or dweebs – here he’s the big stud at the local beach who makes eyes at new girl Deborah Walley. Walley doesn’t like cocky guys, preferring the intellectual type – so Kirk pretends to be his own nerdy brother. The guts of the “plot” has Walley and Kirk compete in some tournament to be the most awesome person on the beach (or something). It’s not enough story to sustain a feature – the best Beach Party movies always made sure a couple of plots were going on, but this only as the one. (There is a romance between the side kicks but not enough is made for it.)

The influence of the Beach Party series is clear elsewhere with the cast including clones of Deadhead (the Bobby Pickett character – he even has an up-turned hat) and Big Daddy (Sid Haig). There are also plenty of Beach Party-type musical numbers, hang outs and sporting events. It’s a shame there isn’t a Harvey von Zipper character, he might have given the story more conflict. Roger Corman fans might get a kick out of Kirk and Walley going to see Attack of the Crab Monsters at the movies.

Rothman did try to bring a feminist perspective to her work – Walley is a spirited, intelligent heroine who pursues nerdy Kirk and matches cool Kirk event for event –although the message is mixed at the end when Kirk throws the event so Walley can win. Walley and Kirk are very engaging, and work well together; she spends the last act of the film running around in a bikini and he in shorts – but he’s seen sucking in his gut a few times. 

It’s an overcast, gloomy-looking movie – the photography isn’t bright or colourful. But the music is great. The guitar riff played throughout the film is liable to get stuck in your head afterwards. And I liked the use of title cards during the credits, too.

Movie review – “Catalina Capers” (1967) **

Dopey beach party film was one of the last in the genre, but at least is cheery and unpretentious. The plot smacks a little of Disney TV – it involves two friends on holiday in Catalina who get caught up in the theft of some museum artifacts – so it’s entirely appropriate that Tommy Kirk plays one of the leads. Kirk is quite animated here, playing a Midwesterner who’s never seen the sea before. Catalina isn’t that pretty – it seems to be a good place to take your boat, really – but there are lots of dances and some decent musical numbers (including one from Little Richard!). 

The supporting cast play in a very broad, over the top style – you can see the influence of the AIP films in the casting, eg “here’s the Buster Keaton role, here’s the Keenan Wynn role”. Michael Blodgett is in it (he did the choreography) and Ted V Mikels was the DOP.

Movie review – “The Sister in Law” (1974) *

By Crown International standards this is made by A list talent – it stars John Savage (who also did the music) and was written and directed by Joseph Ruben. Savage plays a young man who comes home from hitchhiking to find his sister in law determined to seduce him and wreck his family. (Interesting parallels with Ruben’s later The Stepfather). His brother is involved in the mob. There’s a pretty decent cat fight in a pool and an unfortunate scene where Savage molests a girl while she’s asleep and she resists but it drags on for far too long and isn't sexy or exciting enough. The sole interest towards the end comes from trying to guess whether Savage or his brother is going to be killed by the mob.

Movie review – “Cindy and Donna” (1970) **

Sleazy Crown International sexploiter about two sisters who have a wild weekend. Mum’s a drunk, Dad sleeps with prostitutes and his eldest daughter Donna – who poses nude and is gangbanged by her boyfriend and his mates (with her consent). Younger daughter Cindy tries sex with her female friend, who tells her “it was fun… but it’s no substitute for the real thing” – so she sleeps with Donna’s boyfriend. Donna walks in and sees, then runs out and is run over. Tragic ending! A film made by and for dirty old men, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t hot at times and Cindy and Donna are at least good looking, Cindy especially.

Movie review – “Malibu High” (1979) *1/2

Trashy Crown International exploitationer about a high school student who turns to hooking. Angel may have been an honour student by day hooker by night – this one is just a bad, lazy student looking to get ahead. She starts with a teacher, then goes to general hooking, then another teacher, then she changes pimps, then kills a customer, then kills her old pimp. Most of her sex scenes are with middle aged men. It gets increasingly silly as it goes on and the acting doesn’t improve; however there is a lot of stuff going on and you do find yourself watching.

Movie review – “Pick Up” (1974) *

Starts unpromisingly with the sound of a man urinating by a mobile phone. Two girls hitch a ride with the man, and they get stuck in a swamp. One of the girls has sex with the guy (often in the woods) and does a lot of frolicking; the other girl is into tarot cards and flashbacks to being molested by a priest and teenage sex. The guy kills a wild boar at it seems like the filmmakers actually did it. The tarot card girl goes crazy, imagining clowns and a politician who goes door knocking in the swamp.

There’s a bit of nudity but the running time feels mostly padded – lots of shots of driving, walking around swamps, etc. They try to do something difference with the mad tarot girl and moody shots etc but it drags and isn’t that interesting. Neither good grind house, nor good art house.

Movie review – “The Teacher” (1974) * (warning: spoilers)

It takes a special film to combine the two most basic exploitation plots – a teacher having an affair with a younger student, and a stalker – to produce a dud film. The title character is admittedly hot – she’s perved upon by some young men, one of whom falls to his death doing so. He was surprised by a psycho pervert, who blames the survivor and threatens to kill him if he tells the police what happens. The survivor is then seduced by the teacher.

The music is that combination of guitar and flute that you hear in 70s movies and TV shows. Marquee value is provided by Jay North, TV’s Denis the Menace. The psycho is a familiar actor from rapists. Quinn O’Hara has a small role as do the mothers of John Cassavetes and Gina Rowlands

Remarkably bad shot composition – in one scene by the pool water gets on the lens. The acting is poor and the running time is padded with shots of cars driving, bicycles riding, and walking from A to B. There’s not even decent sex scene – the kid never seems like he penetrates. Utterly illogical – there is no good reason not to call the police.

The most hilarious scene is when the teacher and the student are on a boat and the stalker get changed into his frogman outfit to stalk them. One shock is the death of the kid – I genuinely didn’t see that coming. But generally this is poor.