Movie review – A&C #9 – “Who Done It?” (1942) ***1/2

A variation on the typical Abbott and Costello vehicle: no songs or musical numbers and our heroes actually play characters with specific, identifiable goals (to be radio writers) as opposed to just helping our the romantic leads. Indeed, you get the feeling this was originally written for some other comic before being re-fitted for Abbott and Costello. The plot has them pretending to be detectives in order to solve a murder at a radio station. The radio setting seems to energise the team – they enjoyed great success in that medium and this is one of their few films to pay homage to that: there’s a lovely in gag where Abbott and Costello overhear ‘Who’s on First’ on the radio and switch it off. The mystery component is quite effective too, done in that crisp black and white titled camera style that Universal were so good at.

There are some outstanding support actors including William Bendix as a dumb cop and Patsy Kelly as Costello’s romantic interest. The female lead character is another quasi-feminist (a radio producer), but stiff Patric Knowles is not very likeable as the sexist professor romantic lead (“I won’t take a hand out from a woman” – he does later apologise for this but then makes another dig about it). It’s kind of a shame that they, and not Abbott and Costello, ultimately solve the mystery – though our heroes are the one who save the day. Aussies will get a kick out of the fact the radio station at the end does a transmission to Melbourne, Australia.

Movie review – A&C #8 – “Pardon My Sarong” (1942) ***1/2

After Abbott and Costello ducked over to MGM to make Rio Rita, Universal rolled out the red carpet with an above average effort. The plot has our lead duo as bus drivers who, through some complicated machinations, wind up on a tropical island (this is the first of the team’s films you wish had been shot in colour). There’s a local custom involving a volcano, which Costello naturally has to jump into. Virginia Bruce is a pretty heroine (like Anne Gwynne in Ride ‘Em Cowboy she’s a bit of a feisty quasi feminist), Robert Paige a passable hero and Lionel Atwill an excellent villain (the first first-rate one for the duo).

There’s some sensational tap dancing, plus the Ink Spots sing “Do I Worry”, and some funny routines (such as Costello outwitting a servo guy and the final water skiing sequence). There’s the “I want to marry a homely girl” gag, and a hilarious “Deep in the Heart of Texas” gag (Costello sings the song and support actors just clap – was this the inspiration for the joke in Pee Wee’s Big Adventure?)

Movie review – A&C #6 – “Ride ‘Em Cowboy” (1941) ***

Arthur Lubin is rarely mentioned in discussions of great directors but he had a long prosperous commercial career, and could always be counted on to do a professional job. He played a crucial role in three legendary “franchises” for Universal – Francis, Maria Montez and Abbott and Costello. He saw Abbott and Costello through their first five starring vehicles together and his “no frills” approach suited them down to the ground – just hold up the camera, and shoot it. That sounds easy, but directing is never easy, especially not with two stars, and I think Lubin’s never gotten the credit he deserved.

This was originally intended to be the third Abbott and Costello starring vehicle – Universal clearly planned to follow a service comedy and haunted house comedy with a fish out of water comedy (our heroes on the range); it was pushed back due to a desire for more service comedies. This is a bright, jazzy comedy with a perfectly serviceable plot – pretend cowboy Dick Foran goes out west to learn how to be a real cowboy, and Abbott and Costello wind up there as well (unlike Keep ‘Em Flying, their involvement in the action is parallel with the “straight” plot rather than integrated). Since this is a modern era cowboy film, some convenient gangsters turn up to be villains – just like a late 30s Cinesound movie.

A highlight of the film is the music, including tunes from Ella Fitzgerald and a lot of singing cowboys. There are also some very funny slap stick scenes (Costello on a bronco, Costello on a diving board, Costello and the inevitable cow milking) and it’s cute that the Indians want Costello to marry one of their women. Johnny Mack Brown, a B cowboy actor (with some “A” credits at the beginning of his career) is a sort of second straight male lead – he’s not very charismatic, you expect him to turn evil or something but he’s just there, wasted in a nothing role. Anne Gwynne is engaging as the ingénue.

Top Ten Errol Flynn Films

My personal favourites, though many will be obvious

1) Captain Blood – terrific as a kid, and it still holds up
2) The Adventures of Robin Hood – sure the Merrie Men overact, it’s still marvellous
3) Gentleman Jim – the closest on-screen depiction to the real life Errol?
4) The Adventures of Don Juan – the best of the drunken lecherous late-period Errols
5) Against All Flags – bit of a risky choice, but I love Maureen O’Hara and the film hits all the right notes
6) The Sea Hawk – Errol’s most subdued performance but best duel
7) The Dawn Patrol – excellent anti-war film
8) Edge of Darkness – Errol is perhaps miscast but this is an excellent war movie
9) Objective Burma – like Edge of Darkness
10) Dodge City – big colourful dopey fun

TV review – “Underbelly” (2008) *****

Just as Summer Heights High and the Chaser brought the must-see water cooler factor back to Australian comedy in 2007, so too did Underbelly in 2008. It’s a Channel Nine show you could imagine old Kerry Packer liking – lots of crims and tits. In the great tradition of Blue Murder, it seems at times that every Australian actor is in it – well, every Melbourne actor at least (and unlike Blue Murder, the girls have more of a role to play here). The all star casting makes the story a lot easier to follow, as you always remember who is who. Marcus Graham and Alex Dimitrates are back (totally different styles and characters to the ones they played in Blue Murder) and there are some newcomers, too – Gyton Grantley is terrific as the seemingly dopey Carl Williams – and some revelations from old hands: I was blown away by Damien Walshe-Howling as the confident likeable psychopath (confident voice, which makes such a difference when playing a crim). Lots of tits, which gets perhaps too gratuitous at times (Kesti Morassi apparently has a “no tits” clause but they show a lot of her arse as if in compensation). Episode seven, which is from the girl’s point of view, drags a bit, too many montages (actually that’s a criticism you could say about a few of the eps). But much of is so superb. Indeed, the scene where Jason Moran is killed in front of the kids is a classic – I never thought the Roger Rogerson-killing-Warren-Lanfranchi scene in Blue Murder would be topped but this one does. There’s also plenty of classic moments, such as gangsters talking about killing someone at a venue and pointing out “parking there’s really bad”.

Movie review – Beach Party #3 – “Bikini Beach” (1964) ***1/2

The gang arrive at the beach once more, singing quite a catchy song, then it’s business as usual with Dee Dee refusing to sleep with Frankie before they get married. Then the fun and games are ruined by two factors (a) Keenan Wynn wants to build an old folks home near the beach, then (b) a visiting British music star, the Potato Bug, makes all the girls go ga-ga. This throws in everything but the kitchen sink – there’s a man in a monkey suit (who goes surfing – which is kind of funny), different kinds of surfing (including surfers being dragged behind a boat), drag racing, the Watusi dances, a teenage werewolf who hangs out in a pool hall. (Muscle Beach Party had musclemen, Beach Blanket Bingo had skydiving, How to Stuff a Wild Bikini had motorcycles).

It re-hashes the plot of the first film in the series, with a fuddy duddy man (Wynn) who is anti the kids arguing with a woman (Martha Hyer) who is for them, then Eric Von Zipper turns on the old man when he becomes pro-kid; also Frankie and Annette break up and get back together and Annette dallies with another person (English pop star the Potato Bug). This one seems to be set after college – Annette is nagging Frankie to settle down now he’s finished school.

Donna Loren, a pretty girl who fills out a bikini pretty well, is given a song – which is surprising since Funicello is there, but I suppose Loren is a much better singer than Funicello (who gets two songs). Don Rickles replaces Morey Amsterdam as the manager of the local hang out, and there is another cameo from an AIP star at the end (Boris Karloff). Frankie Avalon has fun playing Potato Bug, who is reminiscent of Austin Powers (though you can tell a stand in plays the role in a few scenes). There is a real feeling of camaraderie within the various groups of characters – Harvey Lembeck’s bikers and the beach kids – which comes from I guess being in a third film together.

This has maybe the best music in the series – the songs are consistently strong, from the title track to the Pyramids (a bunch of bald guitarists – including a black guy), Little Stevie Wonder and the outstanding “I Gotcha Where I Want You”). Even the mock Brit pop songs sung by Potato Bug are catchy. (Apparently the script was originally written for a group and they had their eye on the Beatles but they then appeared on the Ed Sullivan Show and priced themselves ouf the market, forcing a script re-write.) This became the most popular of the series yet, earning $4.5 million (Beach Party pulled in $2.3 million).

Despite all the big close ups of bikini clad female arses, there are some scenes that you could argue involve female empowerment – Potato Bug’s woman (Danielle Aubrey) kicks Deadhead in the face, Candy Johnson propels men by shaking her body, and all the girls take place in the final brawl at the end (including Annette). Also repeated reference is made to one of the girls, Animal, being a bit of a man eater. Watch the scene where they introduce South Dakota Slim (Timothy Carey) – the gag being a play on the Hustler’s Minnesota Fats – the character stands with his back to the camera for around 15 seconds with the name on the back of his jacket JUST SO WE GET THE JOKE. But the whole movie very bright and fun and it makes you feel good.

Movie review – A&C #5 - “Keep ‘Em Flying” (1941) **1/2

After wrecking havoc in the army and navy it was inevitable that Abbott and Costello turn their attention to the air force. Again, there’s a romantic male lead – a womanising flyer who joins the air corps, played by Dick Foran, a lunkish actor who was briefly a cowboy star for Warners before they dropped him, after which he played a few leads for Universal. As usual, the social aspects of the armed forces are emphasised, in particular the availability of the USO, soldiers breaking out into song and dance every now and then, with plenty of time off to go to shows and go on dates.

The best feature of the film is Martha Raye as twin sisters, one of whom likes Abbott the other who likes Costello. It’s great to see scenes with a woman chasing after Costello (Costello plays a sexual innocent here – Raye definitely does the cashing), and Raye sings some jaunty songs. This is a bit more sentimental than the others, especially in the scene where Costello pleads to be allowed in the service (“now we’re training for the biggest game we’ve ever had there’s got to be a place for us”). The straight plot concerns cocky Foran learning to be one of the team – it’s not very interesting, and the pursuit of the love interest too easy (the only complication is his girl’s brother is a crap flyer – as if Foran isn’t going to solve that). Abbott and Costello take to the sky for a decent sequence, though the serious plot finale is hampered by unconvincing model work. The weakest of Abbot and Costello’s service comedies.

Movie review – “This Life + 10” (2007) **

Watching the opening credits for this telemovie took me back to the jolt – 1998, watching the series with mates, relating to so much of it. It’s great to see everyone again even if only for novelty value. There are several bad ideas – totally bought Miles as a dodgy businessman, Warren as a life coach, Anna as a barrister, Ferdy as a corpse (he was always such a dull character), Milly as a stay at home mum… but not Egg as an author so successful they make a documentary about him after only one book (do such creatures exist?). Also the basic set up is yawn snore – group of friends father for a reunion (yawn), they clash (snore), and it’s all being filmed for the documentary on Egg (don’t believe it). I remember the character of Egg became boring in series two when he stopped being a dissatisfied lawyer and he isn’t very believable as an author here. Milly’s still a bit dull too – but Miles, Anna and Warren are still good value. The new characters are dull – the pretty, vacant 24 year old documentary filmmaker and Miles’ money-grabbing Asian cliché wife (snappy and one dimensional which verges on racist caricature) – Jenkins had her finger on the pulse for Gen X in the 90s but not so much the noughties and definitely not for Generation Y But far too many scenes that we’ve seen before in Big Chill movies: career woman wants baby and seeks sperm, unhappy gay man, reunion for funeral, video diary entries, dancing around listening to music, breakfast scenes, etc etc. Slickly directed and the acting is fine but far too many bad choices before this baby even left port.

Movie review – A&C #4 – “Hold That Ghost” (1941) ***

Universal launched Abbott and Costello in a series of sure-fire vehicles – making them featured players in a musical, then starring them in a services comedy, then putting them in a haunted house comedy. This was the haunted house comedy, but during shooting Buck Privates came out and was such a success that this one’s release was delayed so that the studio could make another service comedy, In the Navy. The studio also requested additional scenes shot for Hold That Ghost incorporating the Andrews Sisters, hence the opening and closing sequences at a nightclub with a rather spooky MC Ted Lewis (who sings “Me and My Shadow” with a black man standing behind him) and Abbott and Costello as waiters. They get fired and our heroes go work at a gas station – the point at which the original cut of the movie presumably began. They’re with a gangster when he is killed – according to the gangster’s will, they inherit his property (which is a bit of a stretch). The property is a haunted house, and our duo wind up there with a couple of strangers, including some baddies.

The supporting cast is strong. There’s a charming romance between scream queen Evelyn Ankers and bespectacled Richard Carlson, and a hilarious performance from Joan Davis who matches Costello scream for scream. Most of the plot consists of Costello being frightened and running around the house. The house is a neat concoction – it used to be employed as a speakeasy in prohibition so has lots of nooks and crannies (there’s a lovely moment where Davis and Abbott reminisce about prohibition). This has the reputation as one of the best Abbott and Costellos; while I enjoyed it I wouldn’t go that far – too much just running around being scared (in the vein of Cat and the Canary but without that film’s atmosphere); gangsters aren’t as threatening or effective as later vampires, etc would be.

Movie review – Road #4 – “Road to Utopia” (1945) ***1/2

The Road movies were always pretty jokey from the beginning, but things went up a notch with Road to Morocco, then the extra mile with this one. It starts with a joking introduction by Robert Bechley, then cuts to an elderly Hope and Lamour living together; they are visited by Bing Crosby, at which points it flashes back to the 1890s, the period so well covered by Mae West.

“Utopia” is gold rush Alaska, where Bing and Bob wind up looking for their fortune. During the course of their adventures they sing songs which refer to their star personas, run into Santa, have a bit part actor from another movie walk through their movie, make gags about the censors, have Robert Benchley occasionally make comments, refer to the music score during a romantic scene, etc etc.

The stars are in delightful form and the gags are very strong; the plot has Bing and Bob be confused for some killers and get involved with shenanigans concerning a map. (Indeed the last portion of the film it gets quite plotty).

Risque ending where Lamour and Hope’s kid is revealed to look just like Crosby.

Movie review – A&C #3 – “In the Navy” (1941) ***

If it worked once before why not try it again: so after the overwhelming success of Buck Privates, Abbott and Costello are back in the service (this time the navy), doing their routines to the background of various songs, dance numbers and a straight plot (in this case, Dick Powell is a radio idol who enlists in the navy); the Andrews Sisters are back, and once again they’re tormented by an authority figure (in this case, singing cowboy Dick Foran). Normally the romantic male leads of Abbott and Costello were played by unknowns so it’s a surprise to see Dick Powell in that role (this was in the awkward stage of his career, after he’d left Warners and before he re-invented himself as a tough guy then later director). The guts of his story concerns Powell’s character being stalked by a female paparazzo – which is a kind of mean-spirited story, mainly because the paparazzo (Claire Dodd) is so unlikeable.

The Andrews Sisters have a bigger role here – well, one of them, at least (she’s Costello’s love interest) – as usual, the third Andrews sister just kind of hangs out awkwardly on the side. Like the summer camp army in Buck Privates, there’s plenty of time in the navy to sing, tap dance, watch Andrews Sisters concerts and socialise in Hawaii.

The scene where Abbott fleeces Costello into losing his money in a gambling con – a hilarious moment - has resonance with the knowledge that both men great slabs of their fortune through gambling. But that was part of the appeal of their humour, based in cruelty and the nasty things humans do to each other. There’s also the brilliant “7 x 13 = 28” routine, a classic of surrealistic logic in the vein of “Who’s on First”. It doesn’t have the freshness of Buck Private, and has the not-very-nice female lead but is still entertaining. (NB all the characters are at Pearl Harbour by the end – does this mean they all get killed come Dec 7 1941?)

Book review – “It Ain’t No Sin” by Simon Louvish

The only previous book I read on Mae West I only remember because the jacket photo had the author holding a white cat – it was one of the worst author photos I’d seen. I had the sense it wasn’t very thorough a work, so it was terrific to see Louvish turn his eye to the blonde not-as-young-as-she-claimed bombshell.

Louvish has written biographies on WC Fields and the Marx Brothers, both of which I’ve kept meaning to read but never gotten around to. That is no dig at him – it’s just a weird thing that’s happened. He’s a good writer and excellent researcher.

He has two strengths (1) he treats West’s movie career as one chapter in a long career rather than the be all and end all, so he gives appropriate weight to her time in vaudeville, burlesque and on the legitimate stage. In particular he pays particular attention to her writing (something at which she worked long and hard) (2) he goes over his subject thoroughly. Sometimes West gets lost in the context but in some ways that’s inevitable – when all’s said in done West was a bit dull, she just did the hard yards at home.

West was pure show biz – she never stopped thinking of herself as a star until the end, always pushing her stage shows, movie scripts, etc. Her persona was incredibly strong – when you think about it she only really made three classic films (She Done Him Wrong, I’m No Angel, My Little Chickadee) – there were others which probably could and would have been classics had not they been neutered by the Hays office (Belle of the Nineties and Klondike Annie – Louvish argues the latter was perhaps West’s most autobiographical work, which is fascinating). But you do something well, everyone will remember you.

Movie review – A&C #2 – “Buck Privates” (1941) ****

Abbott and Costello took to the big screen like a duck to water (former stunt man Costello especially proving to be a gifted visual comic), so Universal quickly ushered them into their own vehicle. It was the safest of comic formats – a service comedy – and the public gobbled it up. Apart from the dynamic performances of the leads, who are in excellent form, it’s likely audiences also enjoyed the depiction of army life – this film makes it seem like summer camp, where you’ll have camp hostesses give you cigarettes and apples and sing you songs (including the Andrews sisters) and plenty of time off to go jitterbugging, play ping pong in the rec hall, watch boxing or sing romantic songs in the evening by cherry blossoms.

Some fans pooh-pooh the amount of time given to the “straight” story in this film about a playboy drafted into the army along with his chauffeur and fighting over the one girl, but I enjoy it. (NB For all the noises about the army treating everyone equally, it’s fairly obvious the girl prefers the playboy (helped by the fact that (a) his character has a bit of a journey whereas the chauffeur has none, and (b) Lee Bowman is far more charismatic actor than Alan Curtis) – though the way Curtis climbs over Bowman’s back during the manoeuvres sequence and the fact all three go off together at the end of officers school implies maybe they’ll be able to live in a ménage a trios.

Anyway, the story acts as a nice counter point to the Abbott and Costello routines, which are really outstanding (Costello also sings a very funny song and takes place in a brilliant boxing match). Nat Pendleton is hilarious as the sergeant understandably tormented by the duo, and as an unexpected bonus there are some really good songs, especially the “Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy”. Lovers of bad extra acting watch this production number closely – look how bored the soldier is who is standing next to the least pretty Andrews sister (the one whom can’t dance very well and isn’t given any dialogue) – he can’t even clap in time.

Movie review – A&C #1 – “One Night in the Tropics” (1940) ***

Utterly silly trifle which is remembered today solely for introducing Abbott and Costello to cinema audiences but actually remains terrific fun. Well, terrific if you don’t mind comedies where the central conceit is love insurance – Alan Jones sells a one million dollar love insurance policy to his friend Bob Cummings and has to ensure he gets married. A night club owner underwrites the policy so to make sure things so smoothly he sends two enforces – our two boys. They prove themselves a natural to the camera – the whole idea of them as gangster enforcers is hilarious and could have been re-used in their later films.

This was a good vehicle to introduce Abbott and Costello on the big screen (note how we hear their voices before seeing them – they were familiar to audiences due to radio work), as the action isn’t dependent on them but enables them to still do some schtick, including the classic “Who’s on First”. (Hal Wallis introduced Martin and Lewis in a similar way in My Friend Irma.) I quite enjoyed the non-A&C stuff too – Robert Cummings was a deft light comedian made for this sort of roles, and Peggy Moran really shines as the singer desperate to marry Cummings even if it means breaking his legs; the other two leads are less inspired, but Alan Jones tries gamely, and there are some spectacular dance numbers and plenty of tunes – it’s got a little bit of a everything-and-the-kitchen-sink feel (gangsters, millionaires, chorus girls, bullfighters, Caribbean setting, songs, routines, comedy, dances), and watching it you imagine a lot of Broadway musicals pre-Oklahoma were just like this.

Movie review – Ladd #21 - “The Iron Mistress” (1952) **1/2

Alan Ladd became a star at Paramount but wound up clashing with the studio over a number of matters. Eventually like most big stars in the 50s he set up his own production company – called Jaguar – and set up his shingle at Warners. The Jaguar films played it safe – colourful actioners in the main, which certainly were a safe bet to start off with, but as the decade went on became less popular and reduced Ladd to a second-rate star.

This film has the benefit of an angle, being the biography of Jim Bowie, the famous Alamo defender and the person after whom the Bowie knife is named. So technically it’s not really a Western but a… Southern? A Western set in a slightly different time and place? A romanticized biopic – I think that’s it.

Warners allowed a decent budget (the production values are high – ball rooms, swamps, haciendas) and assigned Ladd one of their names at the time, the very pretty Virginia Mayo, to co-star – Mayo is actually one of Ladd’s best co-stars, gorgeous, not that sympathetic and very aggressive (which Ladd’s female co-stars need to be since he had a disinterested air when it came to dealing with women).

Part 1 of the story is about Bowie trying to make his way in New Orleans – he romances Mayo and fights a duel. Part 2 involves Bowie and his brothers trying to establish themselves as businessmen in Natchez Mississippi; they have to win a horse race and they have troubles paying up. Again, he romances Mayo (who by this stage is married to a no-hoper) and gets involved in another duel. (He also invents the knife.) Then he has to help out the husband of his true love, and gets involved in another duel. His true love shoots through so he escapes to Texas, which is Part 3 – he falls for a Mexican girl (Phyllis Kirk), but has to shake off Mayo and her dead beat husband (literally by the end) before marrying Kirk – and that’s it. No Alamo for this little black duck.

There’s one outstanding sequence: Ladd (with a knife) fights a duel with Joseph Calleila (who has a rapier) in a darkened room during a storm. There’s another exciting knife fight in act two – one of those ones where the two combatants have their wrists tied. But generally this film is far too long – it goes on and on, another duel another sequence with Mayo, for 110 minutes. And you feel cheated it doesn’t end at the Alamo.

Movie review –Road #3 – “The Road to Morocco” (1942) ***1/2

The best road movie to date with a pleasing air of unscrupulousness: Bing and Bob are shipwrecked then wind up in Morocco where Bing sells Bob into slavery to make some money, which is pretty full on. Then is turns out he’s been bought by a princess (Dorothy Lamour) to marry, which triggers Bing’s competitive instincts. As in Zanzibar, Lamour is no retiring violet – she wants to marry Hope but only so he will die and she has no intention of sleeping with him. The rivalry between the lead duo is accentuated – when Hope discovers that Lamour’s husband will be killed he tries to get Bing to take his place - the gags are stronger (great one with a camel kissing them, and the fourth wall is often broken), the songs are more charming (the title track is especially delightful). Again Lamour really likes Bing but this time they give Hope a pretty girl to have as compensation. There is an off scene where Hope pretends to have a speech impediment in order to get some food and runs into a shop owner with a speech impediment, and the film does fade away towards the end.

Movie review – Ladd #28 - “Saskatchewan” (1954) **1/2

Try saying the title three times quickly. Canada’s most exotic-sounding state is the inspiration behind this colourful adventure, which benefits from some stunning location work and pretty visuals of mounties set against green trees. Alan Ladd made it during his 18 month sojourn outside the US in order to qualify for tax exemption (he also shot three films for Warwick Productions in England, but Saskatchewan was made for Universal). Ladd plays a mountie, of course – though this reveal is delayed until the eleventh minute and he spends some time in buckskins.

The film is set in 1877 with the mounties having to deal with Crazy Horse and his gang of Sioux who have crossed the border after fighting with Custer and are threatening to stir up the local Cree Indians. Because this was post-Broken Arrow Hollywood, Ladd has a right-on attitude towards Indians – he clashes with his stuffy new English commander and a nasty US marshall over Ladd’s more tolerant attitudes towards them, and Ladd was raised by Indians and is blood brother to a Cree Indian (Jay Silverheels, though in the opening sequence Ladd is still shown to outshoot and outrace said blood brother).

Also the motivations for the Indian rising is sympathetically depicted – the government take the guns of the Cree away, meaning they can not hunt, and driving them into the arms of the Sioux. (Indeed there is a slight anti-American flavour to the story – the American US marshall character is a nasty piece of work, and the Canadian treatment of Cree Indians is held up several times as superior to American treatment of the Sioux).

Most of the plot concerns a bunch of mounties travelling through hostile country escorting a prisoner. Ladd ends up leading a mutiny against his cowardly English commander but that’s resolved quite politely and most of the white man conflict involves the US marshal being nasty, which gets tiresome after a while.

Sometimes you feel as though the filmmakers thought “right we’ve got these splendid visuals of red coats against green tree backdrops we don’t really need much of a story”. I suppose they were right. There is some okay action – a few attacks, a chase on canoes reminiscent of the later Last of the Mohicians. The mounties and the Crees unite at the end to defeat the Sioux – its hard to feel overly roused.

Shelley Winters is an odd choice for romantic lead (the prisoner); she doesn’t quite work with her sing-song character actor voice. Because it’s set in Canada there’s an inevitable whisky-drinking French Canadian trapper as comic relief.

Movie review – Road #2 – “The Road to Zanzibar” (1941) ***

The second Road film is more geared to the talents of the stars – Hope is more cowardly – and also far more polished – it’s a real “road” story, with the duo playing a pair of shonky carnies travelling through Africa. For the first 15 minutes or so it’s a rather sophisticated Africa (Cape Town, Nairobi) then they wind up in the interior where they are conned by a pair of girls (one half of whom is Lamour, very pretty – the other is Una Merkel) and wind up in search of a diamond mine.
The playing between the two leads is superb, a marvellous thing to watch, and is the most enjoyable aspect of the movie. There’s a rather “off” scene where Bing sings while being carried in a chair by black natives but mostly fun is poked at the stereotypes (the boys wind up as Gods for a time but they don’t get away with it for long). There’s a hilarious wrestle between Hope and a gorilla, and a charming song in a lagoon between Cosby and Lamour. Lamour disappears for most of the last 20 minutes or so – the Road films were really boysie movies. Pleasingly, no one ever grows – in the Seinfeld parlance, there was no hugging, no learning.

Movie review – Road #1 - “The Road to Singapore” (1940) **

The first in what became a long running series with Bob Hope and Bing Crosby as two mates who have various adventures usually involving Dorothy Lamour. This one starts with them coming back on a long overseas trip; Bing’s wealthy father (Charles Coburn) wants him to settle down. After a brawl celebrating Bing’s engagement the two of them run off to Singapore where they run into Dorothy Lamour who is dancing with Anthony Quinn. The three of them live in a chaste ménage a trios – there is a bit of schtick (selling stuff at the markets, both dress up in black face, etc), some tunes, a bit of local atmosphere with natives, very little plot.

It gets a bit tiring after a while, especially as the duo just really hang out and stuff happens to them. Both men squabble over Lamour, who says she likes Hope but really likes Bing. The playing style of both men hold up very well – Bing’s cool laidback delivery works wonderfully with Hope’s more nervous wisecracking style. Hope isn’t a coward here – he’s always up for a brawl with Crosby and is implied to be a womaniser; they’re more Gable and Tracy in this one.

NB And before anyone remarks on the irony of a film called The Road to Singapore released not long before the fall of Singapore, Hope and Crosby never actually get to the title city, it’s set on a fictitious island.

Movie review – Perry Mason #2 – “The Case of the Curious Bride” (1935) **1/2

The character of Perry Mason has changed for this second film in the series – Mason is a lot livelier, more of a cad and a gentleman (he puts on fake foreign accents); he is also a big boozer – evidently due to the influence of The Thin Man (there’s even a finale where all the suspects are gathered round). Allen Jenkins returns as Mason’s investigator but here he is given the name “Spudsy” – no doubt to give him more colour. 

William tries but is still a bit stiff – he’s certainly no William Powell – but this has a new, better Della in Claire Dodd. It’s also got Errol Flynn in a support role – his first in an American film (as a corpse and in a flashback scene at the end – no dialogue, but he gets to participate in a fight scene); his next role was in another Warren William vehicle, Don’t Bet on Blondes. 

The plot of the film involves Mason helping out an old friend (Margaret Lindsay). The story is quite strong with plenty of twists and turns and Michael Curtiz’s direction keeps it flying along. There is some unexpected violence (Errol falls back and impales himself on a knife) and a song and dance number.

TV review – “30 Rock” (2007) – Season 1 *****

My new favourite TV show – it started the same season as Studio 60 on Sunset, and while both shows are about behind the scenes machinations of a comedy variety show, they are very different (NB both do have a feisty black comic who clashes with a studio black writer, both have the show producer clash with a network executive, both have an attractive blonde female comic as one of the show’s stars). Sorkin’s show is a lot more serious but Tina Fey’s the more successfully realised – it seems to get its tone right. Fey is in fine form playing a role based on herself and she’s surrounded by a trio of brilliant support performers – Jane K-thingy as her bubbly best friend/star, Traci Morgan (what a discovery) as a crazy black star surely partly based on Martin Lawrence (love his expressions), and best of all Alec Baldwin as the corporate boss.

The secret to success of the show is all these characters are impossible, really but they are never mean and always trying to help at some stage. Also the fact that most of the characters except Fey are “out there” means the comedy is consistently unexpected and surprising. The one character who doesn’t really work is the bald producer character dude – do they need him in the show? He doesn’t seem to earn his keep apart from being a more sensible friend to Fey. But to compensate there are some stunning semi-recurring support characters: Dr Spaceman is my favourite.

Movie review – Perry Mason #6 - “The Case of the Stuttering Bishop” (1937) **

Warners tried a third actor at Perry Mason, Donald Woods, and he’s the worst so far – a smooth moustached type actor who looks as though he’d be more comfortably cast playing one of the suspects – he’s got even less presence than Ricardo Cortez. There’s also a new Della (Ann Dvorak who was so great in Scarface but never seemed to make a similar sort of impact ever again) and a new Paul Drake (played by an elderly actor who looks old enough to be Mason’s father). 

The most interesting thing is the initial client is a bishop who claims to hail from Sydney, Australia – but it’s just another elderly actor in an Irish accent and not much is made of the Aussie connection in the story. 

Perry Mason fans may enjoy the fact that this is the one film in the series which has Mason reducing someone into confessional tears in the dock – something which became a staple of the tv show. Yet again, a decently complex mystery with uninspired handling

Movie review – Perry Mason #5 – “The Case of the Black Cat” (1936) **

After four Perry Mason’s Warren William dropped out of the role and was replaced by Ricardo Cortez – and there’s another new Della (she’s back to being just his secretary now and is played by an amateur hour actor) and a new Spudsy (back to being called Paul Drake). 

William was never quite right as Mason but he’s better than Cortez who’s just this wet guy. (Raymond Burr is the one who licked the problem – play Perry Mason as earnest). 

The plot involves a dispute over Henry Davenport’s will – amusingly, Mason represents the interests of a cat for a period. But the problem of this series was never the plots, they were always strong coming from such a good source, it was creating a family of characters that you looked forward to returning to time and time again. 

Some decent support performances with the exception of a particularly insipid love interest pair, and this is the first Perry Mason film in the series where Mason is shown doing trial work – leading to a denouement consisting of a really, really long flashback scene.

Alan Ladd Top Ten

The must-sees
1) This Gun for Hire (1942) – where it all began for the Ladd persona, a top example of “patriot noir”
2) The Glass Key (1943) – classic noir, great sense of corruption, with some remarkable scenes (eg Ladd being beaten up by William Bendix, Ladd driving a man to suicide by seducing his wife)
3) The Blue Dahlia (1946) – another superb noir, Raymond Chandler divine script
4) Two Years Before the Mast (1946) – top notch sailing adventure
5) The Great Gatsby (1946) – Ladd spreads his wings
6) Shane (1953) – the classic Western (though have to admit I find it overrated)
7) The Carpetbaggers (1964) – the last film, an entertaining potboiler with Ladd looking poor
8) The Proud Rebel (1958) – Ladd and his son in a sensitive family film
9) Wild Harvest (1947) – Ladd as the toughest wheat harvester you ever saw, plus bromance with Robert Preston
10) Hell on Frisco Bay (1955) – the best of Ladd's work as his own producer, a decent entertaining thriller)

There is a special place in my heart for Calcutta, the film in which I discovered Alan Ladd - third world exotica on the studio backlot.

Movie review – Ladd #24 - “Desert Legion” (1953) **1/2

Bright, unpretentious foreign legion tale, with enjoyable colour and production design. Like Errol Flynn with Against All Flags, Alan Ladd was lured over to Universal Studios after a ending a long-running relationship with another studio (in Ladd’s case, Paramount) for a one of film in exchange for a share of the profits, and even though Desert Legion is rarely mentioned among Ladd films it holds up pretty well.
Ladd is in good form – he’s a bit sunburnt, and very American, but it’s the foreign legion so it works (certainly far better than his knight in The Black Knight did). In the 50s Ladd often sleep walked through roles but he’s switched on here. He plays a soldier whose patrol is wiped out by a bunch of nasty Arabs; he gets involved in a secret kingdom in the desert, a sort of Shangri-La which is threatened by internal treachery (Richard Conte). Adele Jurgens (in a role surely meant for Maureen O’Hara) is the red headed princess who should take over but the kingdom will only accept a man so they want Ladd to marry her – which is a bit off.
After a promising beginning the second act of this goes pear shaped with not nearly enough action, but it recovers for a last third which includes an exciting spear duel between Ladd and Conte (they keep missing each other), a sequence where Ladd is almost stoned to death, and a decent battle.

Movie review – Perry Mason # 4 - “The Case of the Velvet Claw” (1936) **

They didn’t go in for must cast continuity in the Perry Mason series – while Warren William returns as Perry there’s another new Della (bland one this time) and a new Supdsy (less snappy than Allen Jenkins; he performs a scene in drag). Perry isn’t so much the boozing womaniser in this one which starts off with Perry getting married to Della (their difficulties consummating the marriage is a running gag). However. Perry is still engaged in sharp practices – he puts on a fake Irish accent in one undercover scam, gets kicked out by the butler in another. He winds up accused of murder himself. Again, the actual mystery is quite satisfying but it’s done in by uninspired handling and the lacklustre support cast.

Movie review – Ladd #7 - “Two Years Before the Mast” (1946) ***1/2

Seven years before Botany Bay John Farrow and Alan Ladd combined in a far more successful sea tale. Even though both are period pieces and have a plot involving Ladd as an unwilling sailor who is abused by a tyrannical captain, it’s a far superior film. Farrow’s handling is more vigorous, and you get the feeling those involved were a lot more passionate about the story. Certainly, the story has a lot more point to it, being about the voyage that inspired the novel which led to the publication of Two Years Before the Mast, a book which shed light on poor conditions for sailors.

Farrow’s direction really shines in a few places – love the tracking shot just before the ship sails and there is an excellent below decks murder sequence and an exciting storm. The film is full of atmosphere and the cast of actors feel like a real crew – well, to be honest, I wouldn’t have a clue whether the expressions and details are authentic but they seem like a real group: Ladd is in good form in a rare period role (he plays a spoilt kid who learns about life – Ladd was still trying at this stage in his career and the role fits within his narrow range), Brian Donvlevy and Barry Fitzgerald are likeable as sea salts, the love interest is decently integrated, and William Bendix is strong in a complex role (a first mate loyal to his captain but whose sympathies eventually drift back to the sailors); best of all is Howard da Silva, an actor I’ve seen in a few films but have to admit never really noticed, who is electric as the driven captain (certainly no dyed in the wool villain). Oddly, the film tapers away as it goes on – the mutiny sequence at the end, which you think would be gold, isn’t very exciting. (And do they get off? The film never says.)

Movie review – “The Ghost Breakers” (1940) ***1/2

Following their success with The Cat and the Canary, Bob Hope and Paulette Goddard were reunited for another spooky comedy where Paulette inherits an old dark house and has people try to kill her. The confidence of both players had increased markedly even in the short gap between the two films and they team even better this time around. Whereas Cat was more of an ensemble piece, this film is more geared to their individual talents (Goddard has two gratuitous scenes where she takes off her dress and is in a slip, plus spends some time in a swimsuit). It’s quite spooky too with an effective opening scene in a black out and a terrific haunted castle in Cuba. (Around the two thirds mark there is a bit too much poking around the castle – it goes on for a bit.) The supporting cast is strong: Paul Lukas, Anthony Quinn, Willie Best (also known as Sleep’n’Eat – a talented performer who specialised in “dopey Negro” comedy NB many examples of which are around today but I guess it’s considered okay today because we have positive black characters to counter balance it). There’s also Richard Carlson who is memory serves featured in similar films starring Abbott and Costello.

Book review – “Across the Universe”

Day by day account of the Beatles after the break up. It seems the Beatles spent most of their time being asked when they were going to get back together again. OK, yes, that’s an exaggeration – but it did come up ALL the time. They put out solo albums – Paul took a while to get going but hit his stride with Wings, John went his erratic way, George and even Ringo started off well but tapered off. Reading this it’s clear that John, for all his multitude of problems, was as smart as a whip – uber, uber brain. Whereas Paul was a bit dopey but far more well adjusted and with a better work ethic. The song-by-song descriptions are fascinating at first but eventually get a bit wearying (do we really care how Ringo came up with the idea for the fourth track on his third solo album?)

Book review – “The Reivers” by George MacDonald Fraser

In Light's on at Signpost Fraser mentioned that he was moved to discover Kingsley Amis read Flashman during his final days, and Fraser got on to wondering what he would like to read in his final days – he thought something light, like PG Woodehouse. I’ve no idea whether this happened but it’s interesting that his final completed novel is very much in a frivolous vein. 

Fraser has basically rehashed The Candlemass Road in the style of The Pyrates and the result is a bit of a squib. I really loved George MacDonald Fraser’s earlier stuff but I can’t shake the conclusion that his writing went south in the last few years of his life. I have nil problem with frivolous, The Pyrates was terrific, but this is uninspired. 

It’s got an alright idea – some various Englishmen and Scots combine to stop a Spanish plot to overthrow James VI on the border towards the end of the reign of Elizabeth I – but the plotting gets lazy, the characters aren’t as strong (though I did like Kylie, the sexy sidekick for the heroine), there are far too many anachronisms (they’re deliberate but after a while it gets wearying) and sequences where baddies can see what other characters are up to on a sort of magical television, Fraser seems more interested in long slabs of character’s talking or ranting descriptions. 

Also the world of the borders is less fun than the pirates – pirate fiction is a big genre which enabled Fraser to have a real frollick, but “reiver fiction” really isn’t a big enough genre for him to run riot (at least, not here). I found it heavy going towards the end. I wish Fraser had done another volume of memoirs instead – I think that’s where his passion was in the last bit of his life.

Movie review – Ladd #27 - “Hell Below Zero” (1954) ***1/2

Excellent adventure film which was the second picture Alan Ladd made for Warwick Productions. He’s a lot more happily cast than he was in The Red Beret, and it results in a much better performance – he looks a bit pudgy here and there but is generally in good form.

The main problem of the film is his character’s motivation for going on the whaling trip – Ladd plays an American who flies down to Cape Town basically just to smack around a man who has ripped off Ladd in a business deal (a good scene – before Ladd smacks him around he shuts the doors and all the windows in the room – surely a Richard Maibaum-written moment?); then Ladd decides on a whim really to sign up on a whaler in order to pursue the girl he chatted with on the flight over.

Joan Tetzel is the girl – she has a quite racy gratuitous introduction scene where she’s in a shower and we see lots of leg; the opening flirt scene on the plane is a bit awkward (the air hostess tells Ladd where Tetzel can be found – what if he was unwanted, air hostess?) but once on board ship they develop a nice chemistry. (And like The Red Beret its implied that Ladd’s character has sex with his female love interest – to make it even saucier it’s implied that Stanley Baker had rooted her too).

This film is set in a fascinating “world” – whalers off the coast of Antarctica – with the added advantage of some impressive second unit footage (some of the shots of whales being harpooned and cut up into pieces may be upsetting to viewers). There’s an excellent storm sequence, a couple of great fights – indeed all of Mark Robson’s direction is very strong. The acting is good too, especially from Stanley Baker as the villain.

Story-wise the film has a structural problem – it’s all about investigating the death of Tetzel’s father, then they figure out Stanley Baker did it (just by asking the right person)… and then that story gets dropped while the ship goes hunting for whales (with Ladd serving under a female captain, which is interesting).

It recovers towards the end with a terrific sequence of a ship being smashed by an ice breaker and the crew having to go on the ice and Baker going crazy and Ladd and Baker fighting it out on the ice with pics. Tetzel chases down Baker with Ladd and saves Ladd’s life – you know, just thinking about it, this is a semi-feminist film in a way, with its sexually liberated female lead and female ship captain (and these two characters become friends not rivals, too). Feminism in an Alan Ladd actioner, what do you know?

Movie review – “Zoolander” (2001) ***1/2

Entertaining comedy full of classic moments. I’m not a lunatic fan but I always enjoy it when it’s on tv, particularly some of the more outlandish stuff (I loved the orgy with the midget), and the trio of Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson and Will Ferrell are in strong form (what, no Vince Vaughan?). 

Apparently they thought this would clean up at the box office in the wake of September 11 but audiences didn’t embrace it, preferring instead the more realistic Black Hawk Down (showing that in times of turmoil people don’t always want pure escapism). But it’s cult has continued to grow ever since. Apparently some male models get upset by the fact this film perpetuates the stereotype of them being dumb – like, who cares?

Movie review – “The Cat and the Canary” (1939) ***1/2

Classic old dark house comedy full of elements that were clichés even then: an old dark house located in a swamp next to an insane asylum, a reading of a will with silly clauses (eg becomes invalid if the inheritor becomes insane or is murdered in twelve months), portraits on the wall where real eyes pop in, turning bookshelves, secret passages, a collection of possible murderers, etc. It is still lively thanks to some atmospheric photography and a strong cast, led by Bob Hope (in good wisecracking form – even when the jokes aren’t that strong his timing is always a marvel) and Paulette Goddard (as once pointed out by David Shipman, not a very skilled actor but very pretty, bright and engaging and she teams marvellously with hope). There’s also the always reliable Gale Sondegaard as the mysterious housekeeper and good old George Zucco as a lawyer, plus Douglass Montgomery who has a funny forehead.

Movie review – Ladd #26 - “The Red Beret” (1953) **1/2

When people discuss the history of the James Bond movies they rarely seem to go into Warwick Productions with much detail – which is a shame since that’s the production company from whence Albert Broccoli, Richard Maibaum and Terence Young first all worked together. They all teamed on this war film, an above-average look at a number of paratroopers from just after Dunkirk to the North African campaign.

The main strengths of the film are the performances of Leo Genn (stiff upper lip officer) and Harry Andrews (the archetypal RSM), plus the semi-documentary look at like in a paratroop regiment. It’s well directed by Young and the support cast is strong.

Alan Ladd’s performance in the lead is a debit, though – not only does he come across as not that keen to be in the film, he has little chemistry with his female co star (though am I right in thinking it’s heavily implied that they root during the blackout?) and the whole thing of people referring to him constantly as “Canada” is irritating (it’s like they went “hey let’s all try to fit in our US star” but they go on and on and on about it).

The first bit is the best: basic training and learning to deal with death; there are also two impressive action set pieces: a raid on France and one on North Africa (where they get out of trouble by using a blow-up-things-in-order bazooka, a device similar to From Russia With Love). Outstays its welcome eventually.

Book review – “Flashman on the March” by George MacDonald Fraser

Flashman fans were no doubt hoping that before G M Fraser died he would have time to pen Flashman’s adventures in the Civil War or Mexico, both of which Flashman repeatedly referred to in previous volumens. Instead the last one released before Fraser’s death was a story set during the Abyssinia War of 1868 – a rather odd choice considering Flashman referred to this very little in other books and considering the campaign was a thorough British triumph. (I gathered from interviews that Fraser just plain got sick of people asking him for the Civil War book and was a bit apprehensive of writing something considering the lunatic Civil War enthusiasts out there; his Mexico adventures are sketched in some detail during the introductory passages of this one).

It’s not a bad Flashman; it suffers from several of the flaws of later books in the series, like over-referencing previous adventures, a lack of story (like John Brown’s Raid in Flashman and the Angel of the Lord, there really isn’t enough here for a whole book), and what story there is is a bit over-familiar (another mission, another putting on disguise, another randy princess) and Flashman never seems in a lot of peril. Also there’s a bit at the end where Flashman has the chance to escape to safety but doesn’t do it, which I found false to character, and Fraser is unable to resist a dig at the Blair government during his introduction. On the bright side it deals with a period of history I knew little about so I found it illuminating; also there are some fresh action sequences (dangling over a cliff, falling over a waterfall) and the Emperor Theodore is one of the most fascinating real life characters in the series. It feels as though this should have been one half of a work, like Flashman’s Lady or Flashman at the Charge – the Mexico adventure plus this, now that would have been a real top Flashman.

Movie review – Perry Mason #3 – “The Case of the Lucky Legs” (1935) **

Perry Mason again as a skirt chasing boozer whose doctor is trying to get him to give up the grog – hahaha, alcoholism, hahahaha. Maybe it wouldn’t be so irritating if a more engaging actor that Warren William played the role. It’s a shame since the plot is very strong, with Mason investigating another quite complex mystery. The acting is a bit more even here than in the previous two films but there’s no famous people in the support cast to liven things up. Williams has his third Della (even more saucy than the previous two) but Jenkins returns as his investigator.